Christmas Humor Poem

'Twas the Very Night of Christmas

(Christmas Humor Poem)

Brief Overview

This is a poem I helped write many years ago. It is a humorous look at Christmas.

I know you will get some smiles as you read it.

The story is based in the semiconductor manufacturing environment, particularly at AMD (Advanced Micro Devices) where we both worked. If you know that arena, then it is even more humorous.

 

Yet there are many parts of this poem that you will enjoy regardless.

FYI, I hadn’t thought about this poem in years…many years. Today it came into my head. And as I am now a spiritualist, I believe the Spirit Guides brought this back to my mind for some reason.

 

So here it is: “Twas the Very Night of Christmas”

 

‘Twas the Very Night of Christmas

by Lisa Brask and Mark Fennell

‘Twas the very night of Christmas           

And all the through the bays                    

No machine was running                         

Not even Rene’s                                           

All the programs were checked                

On the coaters with care                            

But we had to work Christmas                  

And it just wasn’t fair                                  

Upper management was home                

All snug in their beds                                 

While visions of dollar signs                     

Danced in their heads                               

But the real workers slaved                       

Like I at my ‘scope                                      

Merry Christmas! Bah Humbug,               

We’d given up hope                                               

Then out in Diffusion                                 

There arose such a clatter                         

I sprang from my Nikon                              

To see what was the matter                      

I made for the door                                        

At my best clean room pace                      

(But at 2 miles per hour                             

One could hardly say “raced”)                  

I pushed the black button                          

And the doors slid apart                             

What I saw out in Etch                               

Well, it just stopped my heart                    

It was not just a smock                               

It was a Santa Claus suit                           

And in it was Harold                                               

He was bringing us loot!!                           

He said that three ghosts

Had dropped by this year

They told him of Christmas

And drank all his beer

The spirit of giving

Was now understood

(To keep beer in the fridge

He had to be good)

Now, I thought he’d lost it

Or was under a spell

But an agenda was typed

And a meeting was held

Where he told us the story

Of how his life had been changed

(But then again Harold

Always seemed kind of strange)

But none of us cared

If his tale seemed tall

Because at the end

He had gifts for us all

As he passed each of them out

He looked over at me

“I wrapped every gift

And the paper is lint free”

As we opened the gifts

We had no words to say

There were even free tickets

To the Byte Stop Cafe

I found myself wondering

If it really was true

Could Harold have changed?

Was he totally new?

But then as he left

He said with a smirk

“This counts as your break

Now get back to work.”

 

----------------------------------------------------------------

Other Notes about this poem

The majority of the story elements and humorous twists are from Lisa.

I assisted with the alliteration and the musical aspects of the poem.