I
have always desired to be a Male Model. This has been a serious desire since
the beginning of my life. And from time to time, I have seriously pursued it.
Yet,
I have not made this desire public to all…until now. Up to now only a few
people have known this desire. Today I express this long, deeply held desire to
the world.
Male
models have everything. They get to be admired for their looks. They become
well known, simply from the pictures in numerous magazines and stores. They
make great money.
Male
models also get to travel. This is something I would love, as a way to see
different places and meet different people, without spending any money of my
own.
And
they get to have lots of fun! They get to play different characters. They get
to wear different clothes. And all the time, people are watching them and
taking their pictures.
It seems to be a wonderful life. Even as a side career, it would
be a wonderful thing.
If I
were to start over in life, I would pursue this male modeling career fully,
openly, and as my major focus. I would have developed my muscles more. I would
have spent much time working on my physique.
I
would also have not gone to college. Perhaps some community college here and
there, but I would have skipped college altogether, and focused full time on
this male modeling. However,
at the time, I was brainwashed into thinking that such dreams were unrealistic.
I was inundated with the belief that college education was the only means to a
successful and prosperous life. And so, I neglected that idea.
But
the dream has never been far. I have actually joined several modeling websites.
I have created bios and sample pictures for these sites. And whenever I have seen
an advertisement in a newspaper for male models (typically in the form of the
Chronicle or the Guardian) I have gone.
Obviously,
I have not been selected…or I would have become the male model I have desired
to be.
And
then there are the stores, like JC Penney’s, Dillard’s, and Kohl's. Whether in
the store itself, or looking through catalogs and advertising sections, I look
at the models and think “I could be them.” When I go into those stores I look
at the sample pictures – of men wearing everything from polo shirts to suits to
underwear. I think “I could do that” and “I would love to be one of those
guys.”
Almost
every time I go into one of those stores, I look at those pictures, and have
those thoughts. Think about that. Think about how many times in a year I go to
one of those stores to shop or browse, and the number of years since I first
got the urge. Thus, the feeling is almost always there.
When
the movie Zoolander came out I totally fell in love with it. Of course it is a
very funny movie, but mostly…I wanted to be Zoolander. I wanted to be like him: “professionally good
looking”. And at the time, I actually
was pretty good looking. It seemed plausible.
But
then the world around me made me feel different. People told me that this was a
ridiculous idea. Now I know better, but I didn’t know it then.
It
can take a while to get my free spirit out again…but that is only because so
many environments prohibit it. I do know some people who have been able to
bring my free spirit out. They provide the environment. They encourage me. When they
play with me, it will come out.
And
I do hope, that some day, I can be a model of some type.
